Who's There?
Why is it that when most people are invited to a church, they expect to meet the 'older brother' (from the Prodigal story - Luke 15:11-32) and not the Father?
In most churches we highly regard and reward 'older brother behavior! (The one who keeps the rules and works hard in the church programs.) We value these sort of people. We want them. Even if they can be somewhat judgmental and hard on people who don't 'measure up' to the rules and standards. We think they are examples of what is most important to God - good behavior and hard work. The result is that we have churches full of 'older brothers.'
But this story clearly shows us that our 'job' as a church is to be like the Father - quick to embrace anyone who shows any interest in coming 'home' - even if it is for the wrong reasons. And then quickly reinstating them with all rights and privileges - without a 'probationary' period. Thus we need to reward relationship builders, welcomers, and those who rush to embrace sinners.
Let's talk about this .... what do you think?
posted by Reid @ Monday, February 23, 2009
11 comments
11 Comments:
Hi Reid et All;
I could not agree more. As one who has been involved in various organizations and resented those who seemingly did not put in the same effort as me. What was really going on was that they were not meeting the standard I set for myself, thus passing unfair judgement. I think this has been ingrained into us from an early age.
Being like the Father is truly what Jesus was highlighting in this story. He was also drawing parallels b/w what the Law does for us vs Grace.
The only drawback to this is not to lose sight of work and obedience. God does ask for our obedience and we must pick up our end of the work to run those programs; clean the church; put the tables away; etc.......
I think the essence of this is to reward work and obedience, but not at the peril of relationship. The work should never become more important. Relationship; unconditional acceptance; forgiveness; grace; looking out for each other’s well-being; etc are all more important. However work still must get done and it is awfully nice to get a pat on the back or an ‘atta boy’ when it is done. When done for the right reasons, it too builds relationship... :)
If the person is working hard at something to gain acceptance, love, caring, status, or relationship, then the results will likely be far less fickle and temporary.
So should we reward those with a good work ethic? I think it is important. If we do not out of concern that we might offend those who do not contribute, then it is equally done for the wrong reasons.
It comes down to the heart of the person, doesn’t it?
Not sure what the balance here is?
Just to throw 2 cents in.... :)
I want to be a welcomer, to rush to embrace sinners, no matter what they have done. They say sin is sin, but we tend to put what they have done into folders. Like murders, rapists,those who prey on children,adulterers, abusers,thieves,etc. somehow seem worse than those who gossip,lie,etc. The Bible, in Jesus' words has those sins right up there with those "really bad things". I pray that the Lord will help me to be a welcomer, to see the person He sees,not the sin,since I know I'm not the judge.
Me Too!!!
Well Said.
My thoughts are that a large portion of the Lord's church has for a long time used the 'world system' of performance and reward. If we do really well, if we perhaps even rise above others as far as performance, our rewards are generally greater, or more meaningful. I believe scripture leads us to believe that it may not be so "black and white," in the realm of God's kingdom. Time and again He shows mercy, grace and blessing on those who perhaps don't deserve it. BUT, He sees them as something quite different then we do. The Father didn't see a prodigal, he saw a son, the father didn't see that he needed a reward, the son needed grace and acceptance. As Chris mentions, it is a matter of the heart...not the heart of the prodigal, because he was coming back only out of concern for himself. He wasn't returning to make things right with the Father (he wanted to work as a servant...that's not what friends of Jesus do)he was coming back to get his gut full of food, and maybe a job to meet his needs.
The heart issue is the heart of the father. If we receive acknolwledgment for things we deserve, than I call that reward; however if we receive acknowledgement, or acceptance or mercy, we receive it because we DON'T deserve it. It nisn't wrong to acknowledge the faithfulness of the saints, but we need to be careful that we do it to hold than higher than anyone else in the fellowship. It's not about acceptance, it's about being thankful for a brother and sister. It may be just a reward, but not grace.
It is a radical change, but in this transition to the gospel of grace, it takes a radical change of thinking. We live so often in the world system (work, school, public relationships, business etc) that we are ingrained with the thought that this must carry over into God's system.
Grace seems so wrong...just as the elder brother felt. It seems wrong because it seems unfair or a mistake to bless someone who doesn't deserve it. However, if we really want to change lives, and be a welcoming church...I think it will take exactly that. The elder brother was in many ways like the Prodigal, he was only concerned for himself and his rights. He did all the things that derserved reward, and the fact of the matter is he GOT IT! The story starts by saying that the father's wealth was split between the brothers.
I love the way our church is transitioning to grace, to no comdemnation, no judgements passed. The prodigal in Luke deserved not to receive grace; he broke the law, he deserved to be judged according to the law, and he certainly wouldn't receive any grace in that system. Not so in God's kingdom.
I personally cannot go back to that old system, not if we truly believe we are sons and brothers. The Holy Spirit wants to teach us all how to live as fathers in the prodigal story. That won't be easy.
It is typical of any transition, whether it be in the church or outside the church, that it starts with a thought, a dream or a vision that has been activated by the Holy Spirit through God's word. We start out with a thought, then we talk a lot about it. (Sometimes even as if we are actually living in it!). I think we need to come to the place where it is no longer just a dream or a vision, where it no longer is just talk, but that we allow the Holy Spirit room in our hearts to actually live it, walk in it, prqactise it, etc. It doesn't require "self effort," it requires self surrender.
It is time to sow seeds into the world to reap a harvest in God's kingdom. God is the only one who can see you sow a seed in the world system, and bring about a harvest in the realm of the spiritual kingdom. Sorry I can't explain it. The seeds we have been given to sow are seeds of grace, no condemnation, no judging, no criticism, no hoops to jump through before acceptance. It's radical and it may rub us the wrong way... but if we want a harvest in the kingdom we must sow.
Lord take the elder brother heart out of me completely. I know You'll have Your hands full, but it's no big issue for You to do it. Cause me to be even more radical (according to the world system.... but yet the right path in Your system.) How do you feel about giving grace to those who don't deserve it?
Reid's response
I'm really enjoying this discussion. Here are some thoughts..
Re reward for performance - I think we have to be careful that our 'well done' isn't just one more way to manipulate people to do more. I think that when I see helping build the kingdom / when I see the chance to partner with the Father - as satisfying, significant work ... (even doing mundane things like stacking chairs)I won't need external reward (although it's still nice to hear 'well done' ... [This is a change like Wayne says ... it's not the typical world system]
I also really like what Wayne says about transition - first it shows up in words (and the challenge is not to think that means we have transitioned.) But the transition isn't done until our behavior shows it. I think that is where we are at FCC - we have it in 'words' and ideas .. but we are still in infant stages of actually putting it into everyday life practices.
I too enjoy discussing this, it truly helps me grow. Seems to me I've heard this before... connect - GROW - go.... :)
I completely agree. If reward is used to motivate/manipulate people to do more, or people seek out the feelings or self assurance that rewards offers them. Then rewards are not being used as they were intended.
The Bible is full of examples of rewards and instruction on encouraging on another.
Is shying away from rewards because it might be used or received for the wrong reasons much the same as banning cards, drinking, or dances because it might lead to sin?
God rewards us, here and will reward us later.
If we are made in God's image, then should we shy away from a system that he put in place? Is rewards, when used/received properly, not another form of Grace b/w each other?
Again, it comes down to the heart of the one offering the reward or the one receiving it.
The other side of this story is the idea of a church that is welcoming and accepting regardless of where you are in life. That is something we need to pray towards becoming.
I'm learning that Grace is the way God intended for us to live. Rewards aside, it comes down to forgiveness and acceptance, even of those you have great difficulty in accepting..... But this can only be done prayfully through Christ. Allowing him to work through us is the only way FCC will realize this transition. As a Johny come lately into FCC, I think FCC is farther along this path then you are giving yourself credit for. The behaviour is there, in fact I've yet to see elder brother behaviour, at least overtly.
Keep in mind that I know this is a 'safe' place to raise our points of view. Blogs, wiki's, or email threads do not transfer the other 70% of non-verbal communication we see in each other that transmits acceptance, understanding, etc.... People can read into text conversations as controversial, or contentious. I want to be clear that this is farthest from the truth, at least for me. This is a safe place.... :)
Blessings... :)
Chris
The difficulties that we will see in this walk that we are on will be when the prodigal's among us leave us then return. And it won't be the younger in age ones that will stretch us but rather the older ones. We had had an older brother reaction early on that managed quite nicely to transition out of the position but because of our humanity there is a real danger that the pendulum may swing too hard in the opposite direction and the Older Brother could become the Younger. This is the danger that many within the "Church" dread with the Grace Message. The most interesting thing I find about this is that God forgave me before I "Got Saved" despite my behaviour and God forgives me also after I "got Saved" No where does my behaviour enter into the discussion. My behaviour will change as I surrender myself to the Holy Spirit, a process that I still have little understanding. The things we call rewards are our inheritance in Jesus and thus behaviour is immaterial. I can't become Bill Gates' heir by earning it, I have to be born to it.
Chris, you probably are right about reward - there is nothing inherently wrong with it. Especially if we are just genuinely encouraging and expressing appreciation. The danger is when we use it to gain performance, or if as the 'performer' I expect it and take offense when I don't get 'even a young goat to celebrate with my friends'.
John - I'm not sure I really understand the comment about 'older brothers becoming the younger' .... that would be unusual, I think.
I really agree with 'My behaviour will change as I surrender myself to the Holy Spirit' .... how true ... his power to transform me is wonderfully great.
I think you're right! I typed out a much longer comment and blogger ate it so that's all I'm going to say now. Good to see you writing more.
Hi Jul - I feel bad that your thoughts got eaten up in cyberspace somewhere, I would love to have read them!
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